I’ve heard of complaints about doctors far too frequent, ranging from their bad manners (mostly manners, really), poor communication skills, incompetency in diagnosing and treating patients, etc. I never tried to defend the doctors, unless when I’m pretty sure about what really happened and that the doctor is not really at fault. Generally, I’d just sit back and smile weakly, especially when family and friends expressed their disgust and disappointment in doctors who totally forgot their basic manners. I guess that after many years in the medical profession, some doctors ended up so beaten by their own work that they sometimes go out of control and forget that their patients are very much human too. Also perhaps through the daily rush, they somehow forget that it’s their duty to alleviate pain, if not cure; and never to cause harm in any way. Or simply, some never really regard manners, understanding and compassion are essential values in caring for the sick and needy. Below is a true story revealed by a close friend who felt worse than her own illness after an unpleasant encounter with a doctor…
I would like to relate my horrifying experience yesterday in Klinik X, SS4. It was a Monday. Since Saturday evening, I had diarrhea and vomiting. Because most clinics were closed on Sunday, I went to a pharmacy and got some medication upon the pharmacist’s advice. On Monday morning, I was still feeling pain in my stomach, and so I thought I would stop at the clinic outside my place before I went to work.
I had planned to go to work, but since I really wasn’t feeling well at all, and it was coming into the third day of me being sick, I was worried and wanted to get a doctor’s advice. I got to the clinic about 9.15 am. The doctor still had not arrived. At about 9.25 or 9.30 am, the doctor arrived and went straight into the consultation room.
There was another patient before me. She went in immediately. After a while, she opened the door and still standing at the door, I could hear that the doctor was still talking to her, and she seemed frustrated and her voice was raised. Then I heard her saying “Okay thanks!!” really loud and walked away, still mumbling. I could see she was very upset. But I did not know why.
Then it came my turn. I started telling the doctor about my pains and episodes on Saturday night. He interrupted me saying “Saturday?? Today’s Monday..” I told him I didn’t find any clinics open the day before, and then proceeded to show him the medication I was taking. He was frowning all the time, and looked disapproving. He told me to stop all the medication I was taking. Then said to open my mouth and he wanted to check my throat. I was also having sore throat and flu symptoms. From afar, he shone the torch into my mouth. I was quite surprised that he could see from where he was sitting without coming very close at all. Then he checked my temperature. After that, he started writing prescriptions on my card. Again, I was taken by surprise because I had told him about my stomach upset and diarrhea etc since Saturday, why did he not check my stomach at all? He explained that the sore throat was most probably due to me having diarrhea, so I do not need antibiotics for that. I was listening closely to him, because his manner of talking was very strange. He was not very clear but I could hear him just. He went on explaining that he was giving me meds for fever, flu, sore throat and gastric. My immediate response was “Do I have fever?” He replied, “No, you don’t have fever. But since you were telling me you were feeling feverish, I can’t assume you don’t have fever right?” I was just looking at him shocked. “Because fever goes up and down.. and you were complaining of being feverish” I was shocked, because first of all I do not remember telling him I felt feverish, and secondly it was very sarcastic of him, almost of if I was dishonest about how I was feeling.
He was ready to show me out, then I pointed out again that my stomach has been feeling funny since Saturday. He reluctantly asked me to lie down. And he only pressed in one area and asked if that was where the pain was, and I said yes, but also other spots. The pain moves around sometimes. He said okay, I got up. Then he reminded me to have porridge and meehoon soup but without the taugeh and taufoo. So I asked “Why not taugeh and taufoo?” Because I honestly did not know. He got angry. He frowned even more and almost spluttered “Because it’s wind” I looked at him, not understanding. Then he repeated more flustered “It’s wind.You know wind? You think they teach me in med school? What to eat and what not to eat?” I was still sitting there, in shock looking at him. “You said you have gastric since young, how come you don’t know that?” I continued staring at him like I was stupid, in shock. Then I just nodded. I tried to change the subject. I asked “Um, if I take the medicine.. do you think I’ll be okay by lunch …(I was interrupted rudely before I could finish) “I’m not GOD, evening lah!” he said angrily. I tried to finish my sentence telling him that because if I could be better by lunch, I’d like to go in to work. Without any kindness in his voice, he said “I’ve given you MC what. You go back and take the med and rest” Zip. That was the end. I was not to say anything anymore. I stood up, said thanks and went out. When I went out to my car, I cried and cried.
Only later in the day, when I started feeling better I realized how badly I was being treated by the doctor and told my housemates about it during dinner. Because we all stayed nearby, my housemates actually went to the clinic again in the evening to find out the name of the doctor that was on shift in the morning. The doctor was still there, and happened to be on the way out. My friends told him that they think he had been rude to one of his patients in the morning. Though they did not mention my name, he already knew who they were talking about and before they said anything much, he was already being defensive and repeated the taugeh and taufoo story himself. He also admitted to the God story, but all the way defensive and did not apologise. How could he know who they were talking about if he had not been feeling guilty about his attitude himself?
I find doctors in the big city very disturbing as I have met quite a few who are extremely insensitive, cold and rude. There was also another doctor I met that was having lots of personal phone calls while I was sitting and waiting, and another who tried to ask me out!! What has happened to the professionalism of these doctors? I am now very reluctant to go to a clinic when I feel sick. No longer do I feel safe or comforted knowing that after seeing the doctor, I’ll be better. Patients are usually ill, that is why they need to visit a clinic in the first place. A little smile and understanding would be so much better than frowns and sarcasms. Or other weird and ill intentions like asking a patient out!
omegosh. the behaviour of that doc is simply appalling!
[...] tells about her friend’s bad experience with a rude, sarcastic and insensitive doctor. eColi questions the need for the arbitrary 30-minute resuscitation before pronouncing someone is [...]
[...] a more serious note, Cindy tells about her friend’s bad experience with a rude, sarcastic and insensitive doctor. eColi questions the need for the arbitrary 30-minute resuscitation before pronouncing someone is [...]
Thanks for sharing this. Where did she first write this account of the experience?
Bernard: She wrote this to the MMA about 2 weeks ago.
i have ms and have seen alot of doctors like that
we dont go to them to chat and waste time …we go for help
i have lost my repect for doctors who thinks them self- GOD
the last doctor tried to blame me.
that is why on the last visit i took my husband and he was shocked how i was treated
i then spoke to the office manager who of course took the doctor side
i dont want a best friend but do your job
My doctor was on vacation and had one of his partners follow up with me regarding the muscle pain I was experience taking statins to lower my genetically high cholesterol levels. I’m only 26 and my doctor is totally understanding about it. Anyway, Dr. Fill-In was the rudest person I’d ever talked to. After listening to her scoff about how high my levels are and bark at me about why I’m on medicine if it causes me pain , I had to ask when my doctor would be back. It was my way of saying, “I really don’t want to deal with you and your nasty attitude.” She let me know he would be back as soon as Monday (she called on a Thursday) and I was all too enthusiastic when I replied, “Oh, great!” She got mad at that and proceeded to slam the phone down in my ear! Geez! Her behavior made me appreciate the robotic, but kind nature of my regular doctor! Why do people treat each other with such disdain, doctor or not? Common courtesy goes a lot further than rudeness….
I was supossed to be having surgery on a “lump” under my arm, i was told by another doctor it was a “lump” and a possibility of getting cancer there in the future if it was not removed….so opted in for the surgery as any sane person would……couldn’t sleep for worry went in to get the surgery and had the drawings done where they were gonna cut me etc..spoke to the anethatist about the procedure but was waiting on the consultant coming to check it out, he came in felt about and said…”that is not a lump my dear it is a collection of fatty cells…(i’m not a huge person i’m not long after having my second baby) he then proceeded on telling me if i lost a stone the “lump” would go away..fair enough i thought then he proceeded in grabbing my fat around my waist and said “if your not bothered about this fat and pointed to my bingo wings or this fat i wouldn’t worry about this under your arm” am i maybe being over sensitive or was that a very inapropriate thing to do??? i feel totally let down like it was my fault i didn’t need the surgery done and then insulted by him GRABBING my fat…jeez i’ve even grabbed my fat and its mine…:0(
Janette: I can’t believe he did THAT to u – that’s TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE. that’s equivalent to calling a friend/acquaintance “fatso” – in fact, i think it’s worse than that. u’re right… it’s your fat and only u can touch it. even if a spouse grab it that way u might also feel insulted, let alone a doctor. i guess your doctor needs to go to a workshop on COMMUNICATING SKILLS and PROPER BEDSIDE MANNERS (i thought they teach that in medical school?). u should let him know that it was a bad thing to do (doc or no doc) the next time u see him.
However, on a brighter side of the picture – let’s hope he’s right that it’s just disposition of fat, not a cancerous lump
God bless u…
It seems that, often the medical office staff are more “professional” than the so called “professionals”
I have been trying for a long time to find a doctor that I feel comfortable with without sucess. I had a doctor slam the door when she left the room, listened to one yap on the phone about how her friend suzie was intimidated by her and then asked me to wait another twenty minutes because I asked two questions instead of one, and one who made fun of my vocabulary when I was describing to her my conditions. Drs should have to do a term of residency at a customer service or fast food counter as part of their training-so they can learn how it is to deal politely with ALL people, like customer service professionals have to.
I’m writing the following to hopefully avoid you heartache, distress and disgust. When I arrived at Advanced Dermatology (NY,NY) I was greeted by a receptionist who signaled me to the door (there are two buildings) so I assumed she wanted me in the other one, once there the receptionist asked me who I was there to see, I gave the doctors name and waited, she called the other building and laughed rolling her eyes. Then she called me stupid, and told me to go back . After arriving to the right place I had to wait an hour to be taken in.
Once in the tinny office I was told to strip my cloth (curtains opened to a highway view) and wait to be seen. I waited with my cloths on for 30 minutes until the “doctor” came in, she never introduced herself, she just asked to see what I was there for, she gave me a puzzled look , a “diagnosis” and treatment which I never consented to. After she concluded the procedure I had some questions , but the good old doctor simply said: quote, “look it up” and “do some research” when I asked her again she gave me the same answer, walked to the door and left. Once home I tried to find information but had to call her to see if she could be able to help me, she simply yelled at me for having to repeat herself and hung up.
Maybe It had to do with the fact that I was a student working as a waitress when I first went to the clinic 2 years ago (concluded my masters already) , or maybe she thought that because I had no insurance and a very common last name she could treat me this way. I may not be a Harvard grad Dr. but I do know what the Better Business Burrow is for.
Dr. Tebbetts of Dallas TX is insensitive and rude.